Wednesday, March 26, 2008

ASAP = Ahma Say Ask ah Pa

I'm in love with cars
I'm in love with PS3
I'm in love with my mother,my father, my brother and sister
I'm in love with seafood
I'm in love with the girl next door
I'm in love with roti canai
I'm in love with cooking
I'm in love with DAP
I'm in love with HDTV
I'm in love with lady in red
I'm in love with Jessica Biel
I'm in love with humour
I'm in love with slurpee
I'm in love with Donnie Yen
I'm in love with Bruce Lee
I'm in love with Wai Loon
I'm in love with short hair girl
I'm in love with Power Station
I'm in love with cruises
I'm in love with curly hair girl
I'm in love with futsal
I'm in love with Teresa
I'm in love with boxing
I'm in love with photography
I'm in love with arts
I'm in love with Emma
I'm in love with racing
I'm in love with Aunty selling nasi lemak
I'm in love with sweet girl
I'm in love with Tea plantation
I'm in love with girl selling fish ball
I'm in love with MONEY

Monday, March 24, 2008

My brain gonna explode soon

I'm in utter impatient mood.

Hardly can wait to play
1)Grand Turismo 5
2)Rock Band
3)Army of Two
5)Rachet & Clank: Future Destruction
6)Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare
7)Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriot
9)GTA 4

on PS3 coupled with a nice sound system and supporting HDTV.

Monday, March 17, 2008

Tamil version of Bad Boys 2

WTF!! We actually have our own version of Bad Boys 2 movie in Malaysia. Check out the video below. I was laughing my ass out when I see all the props they use are LOCALS MADE!!! Gempak giler.

Friday, March 14, 2008

Bimbo posting. Recap every shit you feel.Rambling warned.

" Dude, I need to blog.I need to blog! I need to pen down my current feeling NOW!" is exactly what I uttered in class yesterday at approximately 2.34pm. My hand is itched of typing down my emotion, wanting to let the whole world know what I was feeling at that particular moment of time.

I wanted to die. Commit suicide. My emo-ness has transended my body and soul, again. I can't no longer endure the agony. I need to end it, fast and thoroughly. I want to die yet frantic of pain infliction. I kinda like the feeling when the nurse poke a tranquillizer into my blood vein as an ease of pain when donating blood. It's titillating just for your info. Speaking of donating blood, how many brave guy/girl out there actually have the balls/tits of steel to donate blood?

I thought of cutting the wrist method, but its so scary. You have to endure the excruciating pain and blood spurts before you're officially departure from this deceitful world.That's too slow. I scared I'll fall asleep.

Of another method, killing myself upon driving at high speed is way too roller coaster shocking to me. To be honest, I've only ridden roller coaster once. The heart popping out experience is sadly admited never worth a second try. Even after every thrilling outright dangerous car overtaking stunt I took, I'll take a deep breath after that and repent doing such foolhardy act.

Moving on, I subsequently thought of jumping into a middle of any racial intensify clash so that people will slash me with their parang.It's titillating. Wait, how come I always have this sadomasochistic feeling whenever people wanna inflict injury upon me? Haha.

I want to have a suicide where I don't get to anticipate or taste any pain. I want to leave this world without pain as being my last feel. Maybe asking the US to drop a atomic bomb onto KL could fulfil this picky suicide attempt of mine. From there, all I will ever feel is a bright glaring white light gushing towards me and end my life abruptly. This sounds very cool. No pain but gain. But wait, that means all my friend living in KL will be sacrificed for my selfish crave. That's cool! Picture this in heaven," Gosh, finally I've leave that deceitful human kill human world down there. Hey, Kenny why are you here? Don't you have a class to attend tomorrow?"

Anyway, I can't be so selfish . Perhaps the only sensible options that ought to satisfy my picky criteria for painless and zero anticipation suicide attempt was to get someone to shoot me in the head from behind. Excecution style. However the downside of this method is, whose willing to do me this illicit favour?

Sigh. Now I'm out of option. Can anyone suggest a suicide method? Don't worry, I'm not going to mati so cepat. Got many things I haven't do yet. I just wanna see the creativity of my fellow avid readers. Hit me with some witty and creative way of commiting suicide.

*In an ultra procrastinating mode right now*

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

How now? No evidence...

Indeed Khir Toyo's men has been destroying all the important documents in the state office despite the mainstream media reported otherwise.

Here's a tip on how to become a ganster.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Got money for burial mou?

You know what's the funniest thing I found out today apart from me and a coursemate coincidently have the similar killing method of tackling a girl?

Datuk Zakaria Mat Deros die of heart attack today. Well, he should be. Not only has he lost his executive councillor position in Klang Municipal Council(MPK), so is his respetive family members. Hereafter, MPK will undergo an extreme makeover on its composition which will consist of former opposition and most importantly free of Zakaria regime.

It's actually looks like your typical Hong Kong drama ending scene for antagonis. The father a cunning businessman has a history of heart attack, the son is unfillial and spendrift who can't help but only contribute towards the plunge of company downside, while the daughter dupe the father for a cut of the company share conspired and incited by the daughter's husband aka son-in-law and run away to live happily ever after in land of far far away. At the end the father could no longer sustain the acrid crestfallen injury of his karmaful life dies of heart attack.

I wonder, where would Zakaria's family gonna live after this? Definitely not the palace because they no longer have money to set off the loan for the palace construction since all the family members now are jobless, well maybe Zakaria had pay lum sum for the construction fee hence no need to pay back loan but Badan Pencegah Rasuah (BPR) might wanna question Zakaria's estate over the controversial palace since now Zakaria's estate got no money to further bribe them anymore. Sigh. I think Zakaria's estate gonna leave on the street for sure because once BPR intervene, Zakaria's estate's estate will be freeze until investigation is completed.

That's why, don't just own one house. Now no house edi, where to live? Mild case scenario, as suggested by a girl , live in a condominium. But I always prefer worst case scenario which would be living on the street. Imagine this, a family of 20 comes knocks at your door step and beg for money. How cool is that? Definitely I'm gonna give 20 cent each. Don't you love being charitable?

This is the kind of scenario where I love to say, Ham Ka Chan!!!

Sunday, March 9, 2008

Political epic satire

The GE-12 has just ended. Let's review some of the up and downside of the vigorous political tsunami calamity in the polls towards the used-to-be highly reverence class of society we love to sayang, Barisan Nasional.

The downside.

The day after the GE result has been official, Ah Kong ,the son of a used-to-be prominent Members of Parliament for the Barisan Nasional party, involuntarily(inevitable) engaged into below conversation.

Ah Kong's gf : Honey, I think we're over.

Ah Kong : Huh? (In surprise) What are you talking about dear? I don't understand. But how?

Ah Kong's gf : We're impossible to be together. (with a tone of reluctancy)

Ah Kong : What did I do wrong?

Ah Kong's gf : No. Nothing. You did nothing to me. It's just me. I can't get through my own obstacle. That's all.

Ah Kong : No. I don't believe you. Please tell me what's going on.

Ah Kong's gf : No. Nothing's wrong. Just that we're not fated.

Ah Kong : No. Tell me the truth please. Am I not sexually active enough for you?

Ah Kong's gf : You're perfectly active. As a matter of fact, I enjoyed doing with you , just that....

Ah Kong : (pause waiting for her to continue)

Ah Kong's gf : Just that your dad make me lose kao my face in front of my zhi mui. ( starts fuming) Mahai. You know how embarass I was at the mamak stall catching the poll result when your dad losses his Parliamentary seats to the opposition. Caocibai, my friend jeered me until I got no place to keep my face ar...niamia. Damn kao dulan. Now people say I'm a loser's bitch. I'm so fucking breaking up with you.

Things wasn't quite over yet as Ah Kong returns home with a broken heart, another life experience duly awaits him.

Ah Kong's father : Ah boy, come back edi ar?

Ah Kong : Ya, ah pah.

Ah Kong's father : Eh, ah boy where's you're car key?

AH Kong : Here, why? ( intriguing)

Ah Kong 's father : Aiya, nothing la. You know hor....(pause for a moment) (take a deep breath) drive proton wira lagi better la...

A new chapter of life awaits Ah Kong, a 21 year old lad who enjoyed being spendthrift since the age of 15, now has to starts wearing Carrefour 2 piece for rm10 shirt to college and starts to learn to value hard earned money eventhough we knows that's utterly impossible to happen. Life's change. When it's your turn to become the beggar, then it's your turn.

For every downside, there's an upside.


On the other side of the world, Ah Beng who has been perpetuately belittled and condescended for his entire life for growing up in a financially unstable family eventhough being knowledgable excelling in academics, an upsurge of luck has started to bestow his inferior down to earth life style.

On the day after the GE result has been official, Ah Beng goes to a nearby posh social club and tried to talk to a girl hopefully to get a hitch after all this years he has futilely attempted to hitch one. All blame it on his naturally born cosmetically challenged looking face. In other word, ugly.

Ah Beng : Hai, chick adik.

Hot girl : Yes?! (with sarcasm and a little bit of repugnance)

Ah Beng : Do you know who I am?

Hot girl : Err.. no. (typical pj girl's reply towards people who they think are a joke)

Ah Beng : You see properly my face. I look like who.

Hot girl : Wait a minute. You look like the opposition leader who just won a Parliamentary seat in xxxxx yesterday. Don't tell me you're his son.

Ah Beng : Well, I can't tell a lie to a sweet lady like you right.

Hot girl : Haha, that's flattering.

Ah Beng : Have you driven a ferrari before?

Hot girl : No.

Ah Beng : Me either but you know what, I drives a Mercedes Benz AMG CLK63. It just came in today. I was going to give it a spin just now,you wanna tag along? Maybe after that we can catch our dinner at Mandarin Oriental at VIP exclusive room. Oh did I tell you that I had a platinum card too? It came in today as well. Man,this things really convenience.

At henceforth, Ah Beng starts to enjoy the fake heart-throb lifestyle of being mob by lusciously curvacious killing body figure chicks with no sweat required.

Disclaimer: (I know this is a lousy post) above story was created out of sheer entertainment purposes but based on true story la...of course. I got a slutty friend who only sleeps with Datuk's son. Sigh. Slut at tender age. What her parent has been feeding her mind with la...

Saturday, March 8, 2008

I urged you people....

I urged all opposition supporters out there, do not celebrate if we were to win. Please stay calm. We do not want to tense up the atmoshpere on the street. We all should know mat rempits would'nt see the election result as maturely as we do. Don't add another dark history into our child's history textbook.

Please stay calm....

Saturday, March 1, 2008 remixed

Here's some entertainment before polling day.

Visit for more ticklish humour.